As we have seen in the first two observations on the preparation of a great leader, God had to deliver Moses from some personal bondages before Moses could deliver God’s people from the bondage of Egypt. In other words, for there to be any real change in the position of the followers, there needs to be a change in the position of the leader.
Destiny’s tug on Moses was more of a confrontation than a confirmation. Thinly veiled in his resistance to what was not just an outer calling but an inner longing of his heart to see a people delivered, was disappointment. Moses had spent the last 40 years living in disappointment.
If you look closely at Moses’ excuses for his refusal to accept the responsibilities of leadership, juxtapose to how he had been prepared for such a moment, you will understand God’s anger with the man’s constant rebuttal. Moses had been raised in the palace of Pharaoh, afforded an exclusive education (evidenced by his ability to read and write, his understanding of blueprints, etc.), exposed to the affairs of state, and was familiar with Egyptian protocol. He had been taught Hebrew customs by his birth mother, and now had spent the last 40 years inside the culture of a third set of people that would serve as the transitional dwelling for God’s nation. No one was better qualified than Moses for this task. No one!
But, first, Moses had to be delivered from disappointment. His life hadn’t turned out as planned. The disappointment that loomed large in his heart was so connected to his attempt to fulfill his destiny, that it now hindered his destiny. You see, in Moses’ first shot at deliverance he killed an Egyptian. Instead of his Hebrew brothers honoring his effort, they rebuffed him. When Pharaoh found out what Moses had done, he became a fugitive. So, instead of leading one group, he was now rejected by two groups.
This rejection fostered his disappointment, and his disappointment lead to him doubting himself. So when destiny offered him a second chance, he declined.We can easily hear the insecurities in his confrontation with God, but listen closer… that’s disappointment: “I had been trained for greatness, but now I’m herding sheep. I would have sacrificed the palace to deliver my people, but now I’m a nomad in the desert.”
“Okay, here’s what I’m really thinking: I already tried to deliver them, but they didn’t want me.”
We’ve all faced disappointment. When we do not get the desired outcome, we let go of our passion and hope. As a leader, it’s disheartening to want more for a people than they seemingly want for themselves. Disappointment causes us to discard expectations and can fester into insecurity.
Instead, disappointment must foster our character (Romans 5:3-5), and give clarity to our expectations. We can’t let go of expectations when disappointed, we must simply adjust them.
Moses’ initial desire was right, but his actions were emotion driven and lead to the murder of an Egyptian. When he adjusted his expectations, realizing that Success is Spiritual, his actions became purpose driven and led to a military victory in the drowning of the Egyptian Army in the Red Sea.
Disappointment does not equal failure and must not quell passion. Let it define character and give clarity to our expectations. And remember God’s cure for Moses’ disappointment; “I Am with you” (Exodus 3:12-14).